let's pretend for one night
by taemins
Summary: he didn't realise that she was slowly fading away, like the green leaves on a winters day. - WGM, Goguma Couple.


**Disclaimer:** I do not own Seohyun and Yonghwa, they are rightful owners of themselves. I do not own any quotes that are used in this fanfiction. The only thing that is mine is the storyline.

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><p><em>'I'm leaving.'<em>

You didn't understand what she meant. Couldn't comprehend the words that had just came through her beautiful lips, those lips that you used to claim on nights once reminisced.

'What?'

You still didn't understand. Your brain tried so hard to understand what she was saying but it couldn't. Now you don't understand why your own brain, which was so logical and calculating, couldn't understand what she had just said.

'Do you not understand? I'm leaving, far, far way.'

Once again, you try to understand. But failed once again. It hurt your head to do so much thinking, because you never had to understand something this.. complex before. Even though you didn't want to look stupid, it was only you and her, so your ego couldn't hurt if you asked what you couldn't understand, right?

'Leaving? Where are you going?'

'Somewhere far away where I can live, learn and have a wonderful life.'

'...'

It takes your overheated brain a few moments to process what she had just said. You know deep down you know what she meant, but then you realise you just didn't want to accept it. You wished you weren't so damn smart sometimes. You were so good at denying, as professional as playing the guitar. Yeah, that good. But you still denied the thought of her leaving.

_Her? Leave? She couldn't leave. There's no place for her to be taken care of far away. She thrives here, not anywhere else._

'Why can't you understand! You keep looking at me like I'm insane!'

Her cold voice cuts through your thoughts, making you stare deep into her eyes. You could see a hint of pity (which was probably for you, for looking stupid) and raging pools of anger.

'Why are you leaving?'

Once again, another stupid question. You wonder if she would answer you this time, after all she always answered your questions, was always honest with you.

'Yonghwa-ah, I've tried so hard to comprehend your thoughts, understand your actions but... it always seems like you don't care for me anymore.'

Ah, she changed the subject to how she couldn't understand me. She thinks she can't understand me? I've been trying twice as hard to try and understand her. (But- Angel Yonghwa pops up in your brain 'No, your pride keeps getting in the way of what you really feel.') Then it gets you thinking, my feelings? I love her. I'm so sure I love her. I know it, I'm _sure _of it. But then realization came to me.

_'Somewhere far away where I can live, learn and have a wonderful life.'_

Then again, realization came to me once more. She didn't want to live a life with me.

'I'm leaving, bye Yonghwa-ah.'

This snaps you from your epiphany and you look back at her only to see her fading figure on the walkway. You now act on impulse and run towards her.

'Seohyun-ah, wait!'

She doesn't stop and this upsets you, she always listened to you. But she's not listening now, and she just kept walking, _away from you. _

'Hyun, please!'

She then stops abruptly, turns around and gives you words that made your heart crumple and break into a million fragile little pieces.

'I don't want to have anything to do with you anymore.'

Because she wanted to go far away, where she could live, learn and have a wonderful life.

She then turns the sidewalk and goes around the corner, you watch her as her hair flows down her back and then disappears. Once you couldn't see her anymore,

You broke.

You fell to the floor, your heart (or what's left of it..) had disappeared with the one that had turned the corner of the street. You couldn't feel it anymore, not it's beat, not the blood running through it's veins. Nothing.

It gets you thinking again and you just want to get out, out of this cruel place. This cruel world, this cruel street, this cruel, cruel, cruel... Everything was just so cruel. Cruel because she left you, and that was the only thing that had ever matter. Only she mattered.

'SEOHYUN-AH!'

You scream, ripping your voice-box because you had never screamed such a high pitch, but you didn't care. You tighten your first so hard that you could feel the blood dripping down your fingers, but you didn't care. Your eyes try to hold back your tears as every breathe seemed to hold you back from facing the reality that life was cruel, but you didn't care.

You didn't care anymore. She was gone, and now that was the only thing you cared about. The only thing that had ever mattered in your life, was gone. You knew you took her for granted, you never realized those things that she did. Those little things that she would do for you.

She would hold your hand and give you sweet words before a performance.

She would kiss you on the cheek before you two went to bed together.

She would always ask if you were alright just to see if you were actually.. alright.

She always did these things because.. you, you had always mattered.

And you took all of that for granted.

Took for granted the only that had ever mattered to you, and her, which was your love. You hardly gave it to her, always thinking that she would never leave, never go away like you had never mattered. But she did.

Again, it upsets you.

You get up from the ground of tears and blood you had stood on and decided to go home, collecting your thoughts and getting yourself together. You walk down each street, looking at every sign, billboard and store you walked past. Each thing reminding you of.. her.

You walked past the bookstore,

_'Yonghwa-oppa! Can we go into the bookstore?' She beams at you, you always knew books were something she always liked, it made her happy._

_'Okay.' Both of you walk into the store, she drags you along the aisles of books, her eyes glinting of happiness because she was in a place that made her feel.. herself. _

_'Oppa, can I buy this book?' And she smiles at you, her eye smile which she reserved just for you. You only because you had mattered._

_You say 'Okay' again because you would give her everything she wanted, anything she wanted._

You frown at the memory, remembering how you treated her.

You keep walking until you saw your dorm, with the bright blue post on the door that said 'C.N Blue' and you get your key and unlock the door.

'Yonghwa-ah, where ya been!'

You don't reply, you just walk into your room, dragging your feet through the floor and then shut the door on your members. You feel like you don't care for them as much as you did before, because she had always helped you bond with them, she brought you and your members closer together. But she was gone.

'What's wrong with him?'

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><p>This really needs work, but oh well!<p> 


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